Came upon this from a networking group and I found it very interesting and would not lose anything from sharing it.
Remember back in school where your teacher taught the 5W1H (who, where, when, what, why and how)? But they never teach the correct way to use it. Correct as in the questions you ask will eventually help you understand more about you and others. Well, it’s never too late to start. And let’s begin with the first article below.
Good things must share…aXiao
What’s Your Question? Dr. Phillip E Humbert
Have you ever noticed that people who ask questions learn more than those who answer them?
In coaching my private clients, one of the most important things I do is ask questions. I often query them on their intentions, their priorities, or their daily activities. The right question at the right time can open doors and create new opportunities in ways that lecture or argument rarely does. And one of the most fascinating things is that it even works when we ask ourselves great questions!
I was playing golf with an acquaintance the other day, and as happens to every golfer from time to time, it "wasn’t his day." His swing was off and he was struggling. As he got more and more exasperated, it was fascinating to watch the statements he made, and the questions he asked.
This poor guy kept beating himself up in the cruelest ways! (I’m not picking on him–we’ve all been there.) He would make statements no one would ever make to a friend or loved one, things like, "That’s the worst shot I’ve ever seen! I’ll never get it right!" Many of his statements included words and phrases I won’t repeat in this family-oriented newsletter.
Even more devastating, he asked questions designed to frustrate himself even more! He asked, "Why do I always do that?" and "Why do I waste my time with this stupid game?"
By making statements and asking questions that assumed his terrible performance would continue forever, he was setting himself up for failure.
Notice that his "why" questions were not designed to find an answer, they were designed to berate himself for his miserable performance. Unless we are genuinely searching for a cause-and-effect explanation (like a scientist), "why" questions can be very dangerous.
Too often they lead to an endless cycle of recriminations and blame. On the other hand, great questions are one of the great tools for success.
If he had asked himself, "I wonder what changes I could make to straighten out that slice?" he might have found an answer.
The same principle applies in every area of life. Asking ourselves, "Why can’t I ever save for the future?" causes the brain to give us a list of expenses and habits that spend all our income. Asking a better question like, "I wonder how I could reduce expenses by $100 this month?" leads to a completely different set of answers and potential solutions.
Whenever you find yourself stuck, particularly if you are repeating a pattern and want to change it, try asking yourself some new (and better) questions.
Here are a few I use regularly:
1. What is the most important thing I can do today?
2. Since I don’t seem to know how to do this, I wonder who might know the answer? Who can I call for help?
3. Even though I can’t do it all today, what step can I take to get started right away?
4. Who could coach me, or teach me, about this?
5. Since what I’m doing isn’t working, what other methods could I try? What other strategy might give me a better approach?
A good question is worth a thousand pieces of casual advice. A great question can instantly transform our lives and launch us in a whole new direction. In almost any area of life, if you are not getting the results you want, try asking different, better, questions. I think you’ll like the results.
